For more than a year now, it has felt as if my family and I have faced one situation after another. None of the situations on their own have been strong enough to take me out but several of them back to back had left me weak and tattered. I found myself begging God for mercy and still feeling overwhelmed. Non-believer associates of mine would like nothing more than to say, "Where is your God now? You used to be so happy and full of joy, but it looks like the God you talk so much about, is no where to be found." And I must admit that there were times when I felt alone, and my flesh longed to be emotionally overwhelmed, but the Holy Spirit would always remind me that God said he would never leave nor forsake me, and he is always faithful to his word. I found myself mentally revisiting times that seemed to be less burdensome, just to keep myself motivated. The rougher things got, the less I wanted to pray, but the more I wrote to God. At times when my lips refused to open, my hand constantly wrote. Even in times of struggle I needed God to know that I love him and I trust him and his will for my life. Its amazing how struggles can affect you. Financial struggles, health challenges with me and my children, and family discord among my close family members had broken me. Broken-ness was a new place for me. I had no idea that the brokeness was what I needed to allow God to rebuild and restore me. These issues combined had taken me to a place where I had to come to lean and rely on no one other than God. And today I stand in a place where I can honestly say to God, "Thank you for allowing me to go through and triumph over these circumstances. Trials are only temporary. And I can now begin to see the break in the storm clouds. I'm coming out." Thank you Lord, for I am victorious!
beautifully written! I often tell people that I would far rather be in the fire than out of it. Because the fire hones me and keeps my focus completely on God, while when I am out of the fire and enjoying the mountaintop, I tend to get a little full of myself! Lesson hard learned, for me. :) Thank you immensely for your transparency, it ministered to me this morning!
ReplyDeleteBeen wondering how you were doing, so glad oyu can see the light at the end of the tunnel and that you are ok. I love this quote from Kirk Franklin
ReplyDelete"The myth is that storms have to do with punishment, that they are God’s response to sin, or His disappointment in us as His children. May I suggest that it is actually the opposite.. It is the confirmation that we are flowers the Father has planted and he desires to grow and no matter how painful or inconvenient it is necessary for the flowers beauty.
I hope that you are feeling better and that your son is doing well. I have paryed for your family- God is faithful and He will see you through.
((hugs))RB
Honey, I have been where you are and were. I'm glad that things are beginning to look up. It definitely is necessary to go through trials & tribulations to mold us into who we are and who god wants us to be.
ReplyDeleteI have fallen to my knees praying and I can honestly say that god works in his time. It may not be the instant gratification that we are used to but, he's always on time. I have been in many situations where I have lived that. I always say, This too shall pass!
No matter how bad things may seem I don't let it bring me down and I always say there is someone out there going through something much worse. I pray and ask god to lead me and I do my best to follow. It's been a struggle but, I have put all my issues at the foot of the cross. Let Go & Let God!
It's good to see you. Sending prayers your way!